From the Hartford Courant

I Am...A Big Sister

"I Am ...," appearing every other Monday, explores the life experiences of teenagers and young adults in their own words.

By CLOE POISSON
The Hartford Courant

March 24, 2008

Candace Perrotti of Wallingford is a Big Sister through the Nutmeg Big Brothers/Big Sisters program and travels to E.C. Stevens Elementary School weekly to meet with Daniel. Candace, a Lyman Hall High School senior, plans to study early childhood education at the University of Hartford in the fall.

I've been a Big Sister to Daniel for all four years. We primarily just play games and talk. We've gotten to know each other a lot more over the last four years.

We didn't talk a lot the first year. It got better the second year, and so on the third and fourth. I've learned so much about him and myself coming through this program and I think it's been like a really great experience working with him. I've learned a lot about, like, trust, because for him to open up to me, and for me to open up to him, we have to trust each other.

It took a couple of weeks to get to know each other because I don't think he fully understood, because he was only in first grade when we started. Now, when I miss one day, he's like, "Why weren't you here last week?"

I had a Big Sister for four years. We would play foosball, [and] because it was over at Choate [Rosemary Hall], we would go ice skating. They used to have this culture fest, and we used to go to that every year.

And then she went away to college and we still talk, actually. We IM each other every now and then when she's online, so we haven't really lost contact.

Whenever I was upset about something or something was bothering me, I could always just talk to her about it. She wouldn't judge me. And she gave me great advice about friends, because if I had friend problems, she would just tell me what she thought, and that would help me decide if they were good or not. When we first started she was 16 and I was 12. I think we formed a great bond.

Over the past four years I've watched Daniel develop from a child to a young boy. So it's just helped me learn about children. This has been a valuable experience for me. I plan on continuing with it even if it's not through Wallingford. I've enjoyed it so much I couldn't think of not doing it, like what I would be without it.